Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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