Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize