i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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