When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
