wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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