do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
