is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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