Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
