Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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