I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You may now shotgun with the bride
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
