its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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