I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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