You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
