You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
