so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
