Already got asked if we're dating
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
