That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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