Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
