Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
