Small penises have feelings too.
why do cheetos always look like penises
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize