i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
