soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
