She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Ladies don't puke and tell
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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