i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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