Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
