piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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