My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Randomize
