I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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