ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
