i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
