Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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