I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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