no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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