remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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