I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Randomize
