So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
