i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
