yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize