If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize