She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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