Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Hippo gnu deer
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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