she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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