yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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