Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Randomize
