JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Just invented taco cereal.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I need a beard to bite.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
