I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Randomize
