I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
