If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
