you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
