Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
